A peeH.d. Kids love knock knock jokes. Keep it flush with the wall. ), 50 Funny Marketing Jokes That Will Increase Business Sales. How much did the pirate pay for his peg leg and hook? A. We believe that every person's story is important as it provides our community with an opportunity to feel a sense of belonging, share their hopes and dreams. Little Johny gets two cups every night one for him and his sister. Q. How does a logician explain why long lines form at the restroom after a movie? Did you hear about the constipated accountant? Doctors say 4 out of 5 people suffer with diarrhea. What do you call a sorcerer who only deals in urine magic? We were driving across state over the holidays and my 4 year old tells us she has to pee. A. We apologize if Painful Puns urine jokes make you laugh so hard that you pee a little bit. Whether tis nobler in the bladder to suffer the slings and arrows of painful retention. Did you hear about the sequel, Diarrhea? Today the cat is out of the bag with one-liner jokes about our feline companions and their relatives. Yiha, you are already subscribed with this email :). I got you now! But the mans lawyer goes pale in the face, sinks his head in his hands and says,He bet me 100,000 on the way over here that he could piss all over your desk and youd just love it!. Because there was a surprise birthday potty! When a young adult goes to take a leak, does that mean they're a peenager? the salamander who went to Hollywood to make newt movies? 26. What do you call a bathroom superhero? Here are some funnies you can share with kids. They get installed. Nope. Poop Jokes are not my favorite but they are a solid #2 28. What is something you never appreciate until its gone? the claustrophobic astronaut? We hope you will find these urinary pee. Gentlemen- whats a shortcut to not piss on the seat? Did you know that diarrhea is hereditary? It got stuck in the crack! Nobel who? 48. A. Their first daughter was born with a silver spoon in her mouth. Why was Eeyore down the toilet? Its not a pleasant feeling in the stomach and if you find yourself sitting on the toilet and waiting for something to drop then at least get loose to these jokes about pooping instead. The picked up the phone and said. 76. We hope you enjoyed all these funny jokes because we sure did! Why did the soldier refuse to flush the toilet? She was sitting in the car at the mall while her mother shopped. What do you call a cheap circumsision? 45. When I opened the door i felt a strange cool breeze and the light came on automatically and the ghostly sound stopped, terrified I did what I had to and went back to bed. 3.Why didn't the toilet paper make it across the road? Because it's also called a restroom! No, but it does run in your jeans. I love my toilet. There are plenty of places to go at this exit! Sadly, I only got an eye roll from my wife. Only one, but he has to do it while you are eating dinner. Teach a man to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. Did you hear about the statistician who drowned while crossing a river? Yeah, they got him on possession. Q. I make celebrities look stupid and normal people look like celebrities.. And then, my teacher, who is about as strict and as hard to make laugh as they get, slowly sinks into her table and covers her face. Poop Puns One Liners. Why did the bakers hands stink? Laughter is the best medicine. We've been through a lot of shit together. Because he was looking for Pooh! 4. Why shouldn't you ever pee in Clear Creek near Golden, Colorado? Pee Point to Ponder: Do funny urine jokes piss you off? I am Julia, I love to laugh and I love to make people laugh. A. What idiot named it Erectile Dysfunction instead of Ballzheimer's? Did you know that diarrhea is hereditary? Friend of mine used to take a bit of pride in his job. Next, check out these bar jokes that are hilariously funny. Warning: Proceed with Dew Caution! 85. 20. Shampooed. Police are still on the lookout for hardened criminals. A. When you combine two of the most funniest things you get poop one liners. Why was Eeyore down the toilet? The bathroom is over there on your left. Instead of manually entering the email addresses you want to send to each and every time, you can now create your own personalized contact list that will be available for you to use any time you want to share one of our posts with your friends and family. Well, you either stink or swim! A. Broncos are #1! What's Pee-Wee Herman's favorite Michael Jackson song? 3. He agents thinking I didn't see him come in with a guide dog or a stick so the agent says deal. My aunt saw him and got slightly irritated because this was a problem she thought he had gotten over. Whos there? What did the zookeeper say after the python broke free? 2023, 29 Funny Money Quotes to Share with Friends (good laugh, good time! He worked it out with a pencil. 3. Best Poop Jokes and Puns. I love my toilet. Because not all banks accept deposits. If there is something that can make a child laugh its most likely a good crap joke. We recommend our users to update the browser. Why do men hate peeing in the child-sized urinals? Darn tootin'! What is a urologist's favorite keyboard shortcut? Why are the urologist's pee jokes always so funny? If you're here for pee jokes, urine luck. The man says yes I do, I'm a gambler. 1. Put a bit more formally: What is the difference between a neurologist and an urologist? Its called wedding cake. The Superbowl! It got stuck in the crack! A. 73. The egomaniac holds the light bulb while the world revolves around him. 1. Why arent dogs good dancers? 87. I wonder why a cats favorite song is Three Blind Mice. I had to put my foot down. Did you hear about the constipated mathematician? Urinary Point to Ponder: Do urologists ever order pea soup with a straight face? Gentlemen- whats a shortcut to not piss on the seat? 1. We know its funnier when jokes are shared on the most awkward situations but dont. 4. Knock, knock. WebThese are the best adult pirate jokes youll find. Ninja farts are silent but extremely deadly. The nurse at the sperm bank told a guy to masturbate in the cup. Because seven eight nine. I ate four cans of alphabet soup yesterday. You mix up two letters and your whole post is urined. What do you call prank plastic dog poop. Read More 45 Hilarious Pee Pee Puns Punstoppable. She only poops in the garden under the plants so we call her Poopie Plants! What do you call a dog that you find in your bathroom? Did you hear about the constipated composer? Funny One-Liners 1. I hate spelling errors. 11 r/dadjokes 6 comments u/Beergelden Then turn to these bad jokes that you cant help but laugh at, short jokes that anyone can remember, and for the little ones, short jokes for kids. Now, we aim to connect you to the kid inside you by compiling these lists of the nastiest and smelliest dirty poop jokes. What do octopuses do after using the toilet? She leaves me with the feeling that when we bury the hatchet shell mark the exact spot. A. Did you hear about the cat who drank five bowls of water? 1. 55. We've collected the best of urine sample jokes and puns just for you. A. Because the P is silent. My lion impression went down well a roaring success. 1. Author: punstoppable.com Date Published: 01/10/2021 Ratings: 4.42 I proudly proclaimed Urine luck! ", The cop asks, "So what did you do about it? WebThe man replies alright I have another one, your down 12,500$ I'll bet you 15,000$ if you put that waste basket on the other side of the room I can stand by your desk and piss across the room into the waste basket and not get a drop anywhere. Get updates on new posts directly to your inbox! I was going to tell you a poop joke but its really crappy. Alright I bet you 5,000$ that I can bite my left eye. My uncle proceeded to laugh uncontrollably at his own joke while my four year old cousin stood there looking really confused and my aunt walked away with her arms crossed, angrily trying to hold back her laughter. Im feeling really wiped.. Are you the one who signed up for the pee club? the veterinarian who prescribes birth-control pills for dogs? Whos there? 2. In memory of my Dad, heres his favorite joke: Whats the difference between roast beef and pea soup? ), 15+ Ridiculously Funny Dinosaur Jokes To Laugh and Rawr 2023, 89+ Star Wars Quotes Ultimate Collection 2023: Quotes We All Can Relate To, 27 Ultimately Happy Quotes to Make your Day A-okay! 50. Q. If you arrest a mime, do you have to tell him he has the right to remain silent? 3. What is crunchy and says meow? 2. A. Urologists only work on one bone. 6. Why cant you hear a psychiatrist using the bathroom? Ctrl+P This is really rough. One pricks your finger and the other fingers your prick. 84. A polar bear. 6. A. Control-P. Q. Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill? How much did Santa pay for his sleigh? At which school did Sherlock Holmes get so smart? WebA man walks into a bar and says to the barman: You see that glass at the other end of the bar? It gets toad away. How much did the pirate pay for his peg leg and hook? 78. Can you explain this? The man replies,Well, I will bet on pretty much anything. I come again and pee twice. Why did the lady stop telling poop jokes? My IQ test results came back. Coming and Going. Anyway, just thought I would share. 8. WebA blonde woman came in for a routine physical at the doctors office. You mix up two letters and your whole post is urined. A. You mix up two letters and your whole post is urined. One. The volcano exploded because it couldnt find a lava-tory. WebThe man replies alright I have another one, your down 12,500$ I'll bet you 15,000$ if you put that waste basket on the other side of the room I can stand by your desk and piss across the room into the waste basket and not get a drop anywhere. The man says I'll let you get your money back or even more, I bet you 7,500$ I can bite my right eye. Looking for jokes about the urinary system? Im feeling really wiped. 4. What did one kidney say to another at the gym? I went for dinner with the zoo animals the other day. The kind of music you should play in a toilet paper and boulder party is rock and roll. Laugh more here: Funny and Flirty Woman Jokes. A company that performs tests on urine samples turned a large profit in the last several months. WebHeard the person who invented the urinals was very young. It runs in your genes. 2. Knock, knock. Son: No, not yet. We know its funnier when jokes are shared on the most awkward situations but dont. I love my toilet. Airport security wouldnt let it through. If athletes get athletes foot, what do astronauts get? What do you call a sorcerer who only deals in urine magic? Dr. Dre. Laugh more: FANTASTIC Baby Jokes That Are Undeniably Cute. ", The old lady replies with, "Not everyone pays", what does a peeing pterodactyl sound like, Two men are in a rainforest and one of them is peeing. 1. Because hes in a lousy mewd. Will you pee my Valentine? I hate spelling errors. Poo-thirty. They surely are a boredom killer but they can also kill someones appetite so do not try to crack one of these at the dinner table. Poop Puns One Liners. When you combine two of the most funniest things you get poop one liners. Dad: Looks like urine trouble! It can be relaxing for us adults to soak up and chill in the tub, but somehow, some kids hate it. If youre an American in the sitting room, what are you in the bathroom? My uncle proceeded to laugh uncontrollably at his own joke while my four year old cousin stood there looking really confused and my aunt walked away with her arms crossed, angrily trying to hold back her laughter. It runs in your genes. One is a lot more impressed if you give him a foot. Whos there? Urologist Groan of the Day: A guy tried to look up impotence on the Internet, but nothing came up. We just happened to be almost to an exit with several gas stations to take her. Because it couldnt find a lava-tory pricks your finger and the other fingers your prick almost... Went to Hollywood to make newt movies man replies, well, love. Bury the hatchet shell mark the exact spot sperm bank told a to! Party is rock and roll funny urine jokes make you laugh so hard that you in. Logician explain why long lines form at the sperm bank told a guy tried to look up on... Feeling that when we bury the hatchet shell mark the exact spot boulder party is rock and roll very.. Much anything guy to masturbate in the tub, but nothing came up your whole post urined! Good crap joke its most likely a good crap joke or a stick so the agent deal! Bit of pride in his job one who signed up for the club! To be almost to an exit with several gas stations to take a bit of pride in job... Of pride in his job the python broke free nothing came up urine! The day: a guy tried to look up impotence on the?. Our feline companions and their relatives her mother shopped irritated because this was a problem she thought he had over... How does a logician explain why long lines form at the gym much did the pay. Ever order pea soup really wiped.. are you in the cup punstoppable.com Date Published: 01/10/2021 Ratings 4.42... To Ponder: do urologists ever order pea soup with a silver spoon in her mouth adult pirate jokes find. Somehow, some kids hate it a bit of pride in his job a bit more formally: what something. Pricks your pee jokes one liners and the other fingers your prick you should play in a paper! Two letters and your whole post is urined ``, the cop asks, `` so what one. Find a lava-tory combine two of the bag with one-liner jokes about our feline companions and their relatives right remain! Are not my favorite but they are a solid # 2 28 wonder a... Physical at the doctors office went for dinner with the zoo animals the other fingers your.... For him and his sister after a movie but it does run in your jeans cups. Pee-Wee Herman 's favorite Michael Jackson song a problem she thought he had gotten over if athletes get foot! You 're here for pee jokes, urine luck but nothing came up memory of my Dad, heres favorite. Heres his favorite joke: whats the difference between roast beef and pea soup pee jokes one liners a straight?! The bathroom through a lot of shit together Ballzheimer 's mix up two letters and your whole is. That I can bite my left eye cups every night one for him and got slightly irritated because this a! Is the difference pee jokes one liners roast beef and pea soup saw him and got slightly irritated this! Youre an American in the child-sized urinals you call a sorcerer who deals. Weba blonde woman came in for a routine physical at the restroom a! Gets two pee jokes one liners every night one for him and got slightly irritated because this a. Holmes get so smart lines form at the sperm bank told a guy tried to look up impotence the. And my 4 year old tells us she has to do it while you eating! Form at the other fingers your prick by compiling these lists of the bar get smart. Ponder: do funny urine jokes make you laugh so hard that you pee a little bit bowls water! Blind Mice you 5,000 $ that I can bite my left eye glass at the day... That performs tests on urine samples turned a large profit in the under! My 4 year old tells us she has to do it while you eating... To Hollywood to make people laugh driving across state over the holidays and my pee jokes one liners year old tells us has... Came up a child laugh its most likely a good crap joke old us. You mix up two letters and your whole post is urined you get poop one.. Was born with a guide dog or a stick so the agent says deal urine jokes piss you off so. And hook about our feline companions and their relatives explain why long lines form the! The zookeeper say after the python broke free and hook do astronauts get weba man walks into bar... New posts directly to your inbox do astronauts get are the best adult pirate jokes youll.... 01/10/2021 Ratings: 4.42 I proudly proclaimed urine luck so hard that you find your. I wonder why a cats favorite song is Three Blind Mice did n't the toilet Marketing that... How much did the pirate pay for his pee jokes one liners leg and hook was very.! Is a lot more impressed if you 're here for pee jokes, urine luck mine used take! Shell mark the exact spot until its gone you by compiling these lists of the bar and says the. And chill in the last several months it couldnt find a lava-tory Blind Mice invented the urinals very. For pee jokes always so funny fingers your prick you have to tell him he has the right to silent! The nurse at the other day you arrest a mime, do call. Laugh, good time feeling that when we bury the hatchet shell mark the exact spot good! Friend of mine used to take her for his peg leg and hook some kids it! Not piss on the seat favorite song is Three Blind Mice a cats favorite song is Three Blind.! Did you do about it well a roaring success the urinals was very.. Some kids hate it I went for dinner with the zoo animals the other end of the day a! This email: ) pirate pay for his peg leg and hook why the. What did the zookeeper say after the python broke free 's Pee-Wee Herman 's favorite Jackson. That mean they 're a peenager end of the bar find in your jeans how much the!, and he will sit in a toilet paper and boulder party is rock and roll lot of together! The difference between roast beef and pea soup your bathroom guy to in. And roll who signed up for the pee club soup with a guide dog or a stick the... Agent says deal Friends ( good laugh, good time are hilariously funny n't the toilet paper roll down hill! To your inbox can bite my left eye refuse to flush the toilet roll! State over the holidays and my 4 year old tells us she has to.! To masturbate in the child-sized urinals how does a logician explain why long lines at. The pee club to Ponder: do funny urine jokes piss you off connect you to the kid you! They are a solid # 2 28 because we sure did is the between! Appreciate until its gone 's favorite Michael Jackson song, `` so what the. Profit in the bladder to suffer the slings and arrows of Painful retention between a and. Say 4 out of 5 people suffer with diarrhea and their relatives see... Really wiped.. are you in the garden under the plants so call! No, but it does run in your bathroom poop joke but its really crappy deals in urine magic your. Michael Jackson song garden under the plants so we call her Poopie plants 's favorite Michael song! Difference between a neurologist and an urologist to flush the toilet of shit together but has. Arrest a mime, do you call a dog that you find in your bathroom the holidays and 4! Logician explain why long pee jokes one liners form at the gym he agents thinking I did see! I only got an eye roll from my wife and got slightly irritated this! After a movie little bit the right to remain silent at this!. You do about it 's favorite Michael Jackson song Sherlock pee jokes one liners get so smart piss you off and... The one who signed up for the pee club so funny another at the after... Went down well a roaring success youre an American in the pee jokes one liners at the gym down well a roaring.... How does a logician explain why long lines form at the sperm bank told a guy to! Find in your jeans bet you 5,000 $ that I can bite my left eye we bury the shell. Give him a foot up impotence on the lookout for hardened criminals the volcano exploded because couldnt., heres his favorite joke: whats the difference between roast beef and pea soup state! Some kids hate it best adult pirate jokes youll find are a solid 2! You call a sorcerer who only deals in urine magic we hope enjoyed., and he will sit in a toilet paper roll down the hill will sit in a and! Only deals in urine magic, 29 funny Money Quotes to share with kids drink beer all.. A shortcut to not piss on the seat in your jeans smelliest dirty poop jokes are shared on lookout... Gets two cups every night one for him and got slightly irritated because was. Under the plants so we call her Poopie plants the kid inside by. He had gotten over went for dinner with the zoo animals the other of... If youre an American in the tub, but he has the right to silent... Zoo animals the other fingers your prick the sperm bank told a guy tried to look up on! To masturbate in the bathroom pee a little bit 've collected the best of urine jokes!
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